Recurring Dream

So I dreamt about him again, this time we were having a dance lesson in my (long dead) Grandad's front room. As always there were a few of us from church, and as always I could speak to him like anyone else and as always I was content. Apparently to stop a recurring dream you must analyse it, apparently they are your sub-concious telling you about some unresolved issue- well I had worked that out at least. So I want to be friends, I want to be happy and I want to feel part of the social group at church. I guess the dancing represents something I am confident with. Yet another area of my life that I am unhappy about but relatively powerless to do anything about.

It annoys me that I can control (or try to) control my thoughts all day but my dreams I cannot control. I haven't seen him in a fortnight, managed to barely think about him and then comes a dream. Now guess what I am thinking about. It also annoys me when people suggest I should just get over it, as if it is something I can do. Well as much as try in the day, as much as I can attempt to control my concious, dreams will quite literally have a mind of their own.

I suppose that's the thing about these dreams that puts me in such a funk. They are the sign that I cannot control my thoughts. They remind me that I am not over it when I like to pretend I am.