How did I get to this place? At some point in the last year there was a time to stop mourning and a time to start living. A time to stop hurting and a time to renew friendship, a time to forget the past and let go of my mistakes. There was a point where I should have stopped being kind to myself (allowing myself to grieve), I should have "pulled myself together" and got up, got out of bed and got on with life. When was I supposed to stop looking back and start looking forward? I missed the memo.
But I am in this place, I missed the turning point. Perhaps if things had been different, timings had been different. Would I have been spared all this misery if I had had a job and a distraction, a companion and a home, money and a hope for the future? I would like to live this year again, to be better at it, to be stronger and more tenacious. Yet I never want to live a year like this again. I would like to see what I could have been without this holding me down. What I could have been and where I could have been now? I'm sure I could have been great!
How did I get to this place? What am I going to to do to get out? - And I will.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
No comments:
Post a Comment